Monday, May 14, 2007

"We Don't Need Him"

You know, sometimes I wonder why exactly it is that I am considered so knowledgeable regarding sports. And then I hear someone call into EEI and advocate for the release of Wily Mo Pena in order to sign Bernie Williams, and I realize that it's not really that I'm particularly smart but that everyone else is functionally retarded.

Anyway, my feelings with regards to, as Michael Kay so aptly put it, the Pope addressing his people at St. Peter's Basilica last week? Well, they weren't quite as intense as Suzyn Waldman's (by the way, how exactly does one perform a one-on-one interview with TWO PEOPLE?!). They were all over the place, I suppose. My first reaction was disappointment. Yeah, I wanted him. I know he's an asshole and I know he's a six inning pitcher and I know he's been pitching against primarily weak offenses for the last 3 years. I'm sappy and wanted Roger Clemens to come full circle and end up in the Hall of Fame with a Red Sox cap on and I wanted to see 21 between 9 and 27 in ten years. However, even if he retired or went back to Houston or if he somehow ended up somewhere completely obscure, Roger's Boston legacy seemed to be quasi-restored. Things were at least amicable. By clearly going to the highest bidder (28 Million!!!), Roger Clemens ruined not only his Boston legacy, but he lost a lot of respect across baseball. When you can get David Wells to say that you're hurting the integrity of the game, you've done something pretty...out there.

I got pretty angry for a little bit before I was able to start looking for silver linings. A stupid but honest way of looking at the signing is to say, "At least it reignites the rivalry." This doesn't make it any better for us, not at all. The Yankees got a very good pitcher that we were after as well. Not good. However, right now he is on line to open his shortened season in Fenway Park and as a baseball fan, that should be an amazing night. Also, 28 million. That makes me laugh. It's disgraceful and ridiculous and perhaps a mockery of the game, but it's hilarious. If ever it has been arguable that the Yankees don't succeed through money, it no longer is. They literally bought 6 innings a week at a pro-rated price of 28 million dollars. Money's not an issue for them, as we all know, but the concept of paying $14,000 a pitch is just completely ridiculous, and hilarious.

Speaking of hilarious, does anyone else think it would be at all comical to have Runevlys Hernandez come to Fenway this week and make a 7th inning stretch announcement stating that he'll be up in September? And when he gets here, he can wear 21? Yeah, ya do.

I also find it a little bit funny that he pissed off his hometown fans in Houston. He really can't leave anywhere on good terms, can he? That's why he's still pitching at 45. "BY NO MEANS CAN I RETIRE ON GOOD TERMS WITH A GIVEN FANBASE. NEVER!"

Curt Schilling sparked a mini-controversy even before he accused Barry Bonds of aiding and abetting al Qaeda by saying, and I quote, “It would have been nice to have him, but we didn’t need him." Apparently, this is a clearly asinine thing to say. Curt Schilling acknowledging that it would have been great to have Roger Clemens but stating that we can do without him upset a lot of people. This brings me back to my opening statement. There are a lot of stupid, stupid people who follow sports. Yes, it would have been terrific to throw Roger Clemens out there as our fifth starter. But come on. Of 145 pitchers to have made at least 4 starts this year, we have 3 ranked in the top 30 in VORP. Daisuke is ranked 71st, and most everyone believes that we haven't seen the best of him yet. Nonetheless, being 71st would make him a decent third starter. And even Julian Tavarez is ranked 117th. That would make him a bad fourth starter or a good fifth starter. And Jon Lester is no more than two months from holding that role. So, no, we don't need him. He certainly would have been nice, but he was far from a necessity.

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